On the Road Again

“The world is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.” – St. Augustine (Thanks, Hope, for introducing me to this quote)

What a difference four months makes. In a post in June, I was commenting about staying put for a while. Wondering how that might affect my writing. Seems I won’t know anytime soon. Since that post, I’ve moved back to Charlottesville for a few months, been awarded a November residency at Hambidge in northern Georgia, and signed on for the Key West Literary Seminar in January. And I’m heading to Michigan soon for a quick trip to see family.

I have to admit, while I love Charleston and miss it and am looking forward to getting back down there, my feet were getting itchy. I’ve been even more antsy in Charlottesville, though Virginia is a beautiful place to be in the fall, and I love it here too. But the road is calling me. I’m ready to remove myself from familiar places and immerse myself completely in my novel again. Ready to eat, sleep, and breathe writing.

Don’t get me wrong. I write when I’m not traveling. But there is something about picking up and going that makes me want to move forward in my work, too. New environments make me rethink the way I look at things, make me notice more. And of course it doesn’t hurt that many of my travels are writer-centric.

It also doesn’t hurt that I’ll be in a cabin in the woods in beautiful Rabun Gap in November and hanging out in warm and wonderful Key West in the most miserable month of winter. There are some perks to this nomadic lifestyle, after all.

Doing the Wild Thing – on paper

I worked on a sex scene for my novel all morning. In case you’ve never written about sex, let me tell you that it’s not as easy as you might think. I mean, everybody’s done the deed, so it should be just a matter of recreating experience, right? That is definitely not the case.

There’s a balance that’s sometimes hard to find in writing about sex. You don’t want to come off as a play-by-play on ESPN, but you don’t want to sound like something on the Playboy channel, either. And National Geographic’s tone is really not an option, at least not in my book.

What do you call the various body parts involved? Unless you’re writing a romance, the whole heaving bosom and throbbing member thing just won’t cut it. But the technical route doesn’t work for me. While I’m not opposed to saying penis and vagina, somehow those words don’t flow well on the page.

For those of you who think maybe I’m prudish (total strangers?), let me assure you I’m not. I’m probably way more open about things than many of my friends are comfortable with, and I’m certainly not opposed to using some offensive language every now and then. OK, frequently. Anyway, it’s not Puritanism that makes sex hard to write about. It’s the fact that most people make it out to be such a serious act, when in reality there are knocking elbows and knees and misplaced parts. Sex is sometimes plain out ridiculous.

So I decided that my sex scene would be where I have fun in the book. Where I let things be ridiculous. Or at least moderately so. Once I decided that, I had a great time writing it. The point of putting a sex scene in my book is not to describe a private act with minute accuracy, but to use it to show the relationship between two people. Good relationships are full of fun, and so is good sex.

Oh, and no offense meant to the heaving bosom and throbbing member crowd. Just not what I’m going for.

It takes a village to write a novel

Today I realized that there is no choice – I have to finish my book. Otherwise I’ll be letting countless people down. Friends and family who believe in me, despite the odds. People who take for granted there will be a book. I have to finish, if for no other reason than to live up to their expectations. There really is no other option.

It’s amazing to me to discover how many people in my life have a stronger belief in my abilities than I do. In the solitary world of the writer, I often forget that. And then an old friend steps in to remind me that my writing is not just mine alone – there are many others vested in my success.

Jenny Stott at King Family Vineyard — Jenny, one of the peeps in my village

So, Jenny, as much as it might embarrass you to be singled you out, thank you. For reminding me that I’m not alone in this crazy dream, no matter how alone it feels. For reminding me yet again how blessed I am to have so many wonderful friends, and to have such a wonderful support system. For making me want to succeed.

I don’t care how successful a writer is. We all need to have a support system. A support system with people out there waiting anxiously for our masterpieces. A support system full of people who truly care whether we make it or not, who truly care about our work.

If you are a writer but don’t feel supported in your work, you really should rethink your relationships. Because if you are a writer, you need to feel safe and loved and believed in. Period. There are too many rejections on a daily basis to do it alone. So hold tight to those people who support you in your dreams. And dump the ones who don’t.

Maybe that sounds harsh to you. But what you are doing is important. Trust it. Believe in it. And when someone else believes in you, cherish that, and honor it. There is no greater gift.